Sunday, October 26, 2008

Calling a Spade a Spade

Kids are honest, you know? I mean, brutally honest. Sure there are some who go through a phase of "creating stories" to get out of trouble, but well...their dads come along with a very large tennis shoe and smack their behind and their cured for life. Not that that ever happened to me, nooooooooooo. I've always been honest. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH DAD PUT THE SHOE DOWN!!! Ok, I went through a phase. But Dad had a big shoe and zero tolerance for "creative license." Lesson learned.

I got off track. Sorry. Kids ARE honest. They just say what comes to mind and let the chips fall where they may. They don't mean to be cruel. Ok, SOME do SOMEtimes. But most don't mean to be cruel; they just think a thought and out it comes.

I know. I've heard it from my kids and have the bruises to prove it! ;)

A yearish ago, on one particular day, a few different instances came up and I warned Alli if such and such happened then such and such would be the result. I don't remember what it was now, but they were all very logical things. Things that work consistently. I wasn't telling the future...just spoke from experience. Like..."at the end of the day, the sun will go down" sorts of things, lol. Seriously...THAT consistent and THAT logical.

As I tucked Alli in that night, she said, "Mom, you are ALWAYS right! You said ______ and you were right! And then you said _________ and you were right about that too! What NEXT???" Her voice was full of amazement.

Seeing the opportunity for what it was, I said, "Mom's groooooooovy!"

The amazement left her face and her voice and as deadpan as could be, she said, "Mom...ain't gonna happen." And then she rolled onto her back ready to sleep.

Thanks, kid.

So I'm never going to be groovy. It hurts but I'll just have to live with it. After all I've got other qualities that are good. I won't share the list with you, since humility is one of my biggies. ;)

Today, Alli sat by me while I was at the computer, on facebook, looking at Parking Wars. I was reparking my cars. (What IS it about that game? Why am I drawn to it? It's POINTLESS.) As we sat there we came across someone's VERY fancy sportscar and Alli was oooo-ing and ahhhh-ing over it. She declared it to be "cool." I agreed with her and said that I was never offered any cool cars when I was buying or earning them in the game.

The All-Knowing Alli knew why this was so. "Maybe that's because YOU'RE not cool, Mom."

"I'm not cool?"

"No, you're not cool................ No offense, Mom."


Wait here. I've got to go mark another one of my "good qualities" off my list. ::sniff::